In Hirokazu Koreeda's 1998 film "After Life," individuals are encouraged to choose just one memory to take with them to the hereafter. Jacky van de Goor and her colleagues addressed a similar question to a sample of a hundred participants in their study, “Wonderful Life: Exploring Wonder in Meaningful Moments” (2017). Except for one, all of your memories will be wiped there. Which memory do you want to carry with you until the end of time?”
The sample consisted of 50 men and 50 women of various ages and occupations. They all took part in personal development courses and were asked to spend 15 minutes writing down the one memory they would like to carry with them to the hereafter as if it were a tale or a film fragment.
Van de Goor and her colleagues hypothesized that asking participants to pick just one memory to accompany them to the hereafter would help them discover what was most valuable in their lives. It would also enable academics to discover what is significant to individuals from a fresh and unusual standpoint.
Themes That Recur in Meaningful Experiences
The researchers discovered the following broad features in the responses they received:
- The principal characters in the "tales" were often persons to whom the participants felt emotionally attached (partners, children, parents, grandparents, close friends, etc.).
- When parents did emerge, it was generally only one of them, rather than both.
- The tales portrayed the events in various contexts, but just one was situated in the workplace.
- The recollections often reflected good feelings or values such as gratitude, love, warmth, happiness, pride, tranquility, and trust.
The researchers discovered that the tales could be classified into five categories:
- Type A–Opening Up to Life: the relevant occurrence occurs inadvertently, is novel and startling to the narrator, and prompts her to learn, comprehend, or open up to something.
- Type B–Facing Life's Precariousness: Unlike the previous narrative, the important event happens in a negative, demanding, or challenging context in this type of narrative (e.g., crisis, accident, death). However, like with the prior category, the occurrence is unintended and might be unexpected. The event's good substance (e.g., an insight, a happy conclusion, emotional connection) contrasts with the event's unfavorable backdrop.
- Type C–Celebrations: In this type of tale, the noteworthy event (for example, a wedding or a birthday) is carefully planned and executed. As a result, the relevant occurrence is not startling, despite the fact that it is out of the usual. It often involves other people's relationships and is done out in their presence.
- Type D–Confronting the Negative: Events in this type of tale, like those in the second, take place in a negative situation. However, unlike tales of the second kind, and similar to those of the third kind, tough, hazardous, or demanding circumstances are met with active and purposeful acts, which are not unexpected. Events or actions may also be related in this context (e.g., helping, soothing, healing).
- Type E–Familiar Routines: These tales are not placed in a negative environment and do not connect to unusual celebrations or occurrences. These tales are about common, normal situations that occur on a regular basis, yet in the recalled instance, they are powerfully perceived as exceptional and precious.
Perhaps you, the reader, should analyze the study topic and think about what one memory you would like to take with you to the hereafter. For my part, I couldn't choose between a number of incidents or tales, all of which included emotional intimacy with a loved one.
Important Event Interpretations and Cautionary Notes
Here are some further views on van de Goor's findings. To begin, it is worth noting that almost no one in the sample highlighted relevant job and professional experiences. Perhaps, despite the fact that we devote so many of our waking hours to work, often at the expense of our personal relationships, the findings above might tell us something about what is most important to us.
Second, it's a shame that the researchers didn't attempt to see whether there are any variations in favorite memories across genders, age groups, socioeconomic groups, professional groups, and so on.
Third, it would have been fascinating to compare the researchers' question to another conceivable topic, namely "What is the most significant event in your life?" The researchers associate the question they posed with meaningfulness, although it is possible that the responses had to do with happy occurrences, owing to people's desire to live forever with a nice recollection. If participants were asked to describe just a significant event, their responses may have included negative significant events as well. It would be fascinating to compare responses to the researchers' questions with responses to other queries.
Finally, the authors themselves point out a potential flaw in the study: the data was gathered in workshops, where group dynamics and conversation topics might have impacted the responses. They seem to be correct, in my opinion. It is also possible that persons who attend workshops where questions like the one above are addressed are more likely to provide some sorts of responses rather than others (e.g., relationship-oriented replies rather than career-oriented replies).
Nonetheless, this is an intriguing and vital topic to ask oneself and others in order to understand, from a particular viewpoint, what is significant in life to oneself and others.
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